Mothership

I'm not sure what it is about the Cherry Creek Whole Foods, but apparently crazy ladies flock there.  Yesterday while we were in the checkout line an older lady eating Ben and Jerry's Karamel Sutra ice cream with a straw randomly came up to us and stuck her face rightupclose to Chubbs's face saying, "We have an eager shopper!"  I don't even know what that means.

The Pits

Chubbs has a thing for sticking his hands in my armpits.  I’m not really sure what this is about.  No matter how many times I remove his hands, or how hard I squeeze my arms to my torso, he always manages to worm his chubby little fingers into my armpit.  And proceeds to scratch or pinch me.  I’m not really sure which is worse: to have sharp, little baby nails digging into my skin, or to have a small portion of my skin rolled between his surprisingly strong thumb and forefinger.  At least he has a good pincer grasp.

It seems to mostly be restricted to times when he wants to be comforted, like when we are nursing, when he is trying to fall asleep, or when he is nursing while asleep in the middle of the night.  This last one is particularly annoying, as you might imagine.  It’s fairly hard to sleep while you have a little fist opening and closing in your armpit.

Which begs the question, what is it about his hands in my armpits that is comforting?  My deodorant is “energizing citrus and lemongrass,” which doesn’t seem exceptionally comforting.  And I’m pretty sure he’s never heard of Mary Katherine Gallagher.  

Temporarily Evicted

Because our house is on the market, we have to spend a good portion of everyday out and about so that random people can come wander through our house and hopefully decide that it is totally worth hundreds of thousands of dollars.  This can get a bit tricky with an 8-month-old little guy who gets very cranky when he doesn't nap well/long enough/when he wants.

Moreover, the dog has to come with us, which puts some restrictions on where we can go.  This afternoon, I decided we should walk around Cherry Creek (a local shopping area) so that I could deposit some checks I had been carrying around and make a quick trip to the grocery store.  Before all that, we walked around a little bit so that Morris could get some exercise, and I took the opportunity to catch up with a friend via phone.

Right after we finished our conversation, the booking agency for home showings called, and then our realtor called, followed by the booking agency again.  All in all I spent about 4o minutes with the phone to my ear while wandering aimlessly about Cherry Creek with a baby and a dog in 85 degree weather.  Toward the end I had sweat dripping from my armpit down the back of my arm.  It was as gross as it sounds.  And I never went to the bank.  Or the grocery store.

Later in the evening, we had another showing, so I figured we could do the grocery shopping.  I got the diaper bag, the baby, and the dog in the car and set off.  That's when I realized I had the dog in the car, and grocery shopping maybe wasn't the best idea.  But we really needed some food basics, and what else was I going to do?

I parked in the parking structure so the car would stay cool, and left the windows rolled down.  Plus, it had just rained, so Morris was fine.  In the store, I managed to restrict myself to only one impulse purchase (I even put back the other item I had grabbed), and the only other things not on the list were snacks for Chubbs and myself; it was dinner time, after all.

After paying for our items, Chubbs and I sat down to eat.  Sort of.  Trying to feed myself while feeding Chubbs in his sling with no bib made it more like a circus act.  And then Crazy Lady sat down next to us.  

Crazy Lady: What's his name?

Me: Cormac

Crazy Lady: (wrinkling her nose) Oh.

Pause, at which point I glance over at her and notice she has spilled her carton of milk everywhere.

Crazy Lady: I got my prescriptions filled today and they were $32 dollars.  Can you believe that?

Me: Wow.  That's expensive.  Thinking: maybe if I were at work I would be ok having this conversation, but I'm totally not getting paid right now.

Crazy Lady:  How much are your prescriptions?

Me: Ummm, I don't really have any.

Crazy Lady: That's good.  I thought my Medicare would pay for mine, but it didn't.

Me: Medicare can be tough.

Crazy Lady: If you have AIDS you don't have to pay for your prescriptions.

Me: Wow, Cormac!  You are messy!  Let's go wipe you off.

This all took place at the Cherry Creek Whole Foods.

I actually remembered to get my parking validated before leaving the store, and as I pushed the cart toward the parking garage, the wheels locked up.  Apparently Whole Foods has a problem hanging on to their carts because they installed one of those invisible lines that makes the wheels on the cart lock up when you go past it.  It was half way to the parking garage.  Whoever thought it would be a good idea to put the invisible line before the garage needs to be kicked in the shins.  So I had to carry a baby, a diaper bag, and groceries the rest of the way to the garage and up three levels to our car.

And I still needed to go to the bank.  So I put the diaper bag and groceries in the car, got the dog out, put his leash on, and shut and locked the car.  Then I remembered my wallet was still inside the car.  Curses!

Finally armed with my wallet, we made it to the bank and I was able to deposit the checks with some help from Chubbs.  Hopefully the teller can read the total amount on the envelope (the "5" looked more like a "b"); if nothing else I'm pretty sure they know how to add.

We' better get an offer soon.

Roughing It

This past weekend, we took Chubbs on his first camping trip.  Since this was my first camping trip as a Mother With a Small Child, I searched around on the internet for some tips for camping with babies.  The results yielded two opinions on the matter: 1) It's awesome!  Just make sure you bring lots of clothes; and 2) You're crazy.

Since I already know that I'm crazy, I decided to pay more attention to the first opinion.  I followed the clothes advice and brought 2+ outfits per day for Chubbs, as well as several jackets and hats, a few blankets, and lots of bibs and burp cloths.  I also packed the car with three baby carriers - a sling, a front carrier, and a backpack (all of which were used during our trip, I might add).  For such small beings, babies need a lot of stuff.  I remembered everything we needed for Chubbs, but somehow packed myself four pairs of pants and no rain jacket.  Way to go, Brain.

My biggest curiosity was where would the baby sleep?  I am forever worrying about how warm my boys are (I have been known to cover the dog with a blanket on particularly cold camping nights.  Surprisingly, Morris doesn't like this), so naturally I wanted to make sure Chubbs had a warm and cozy sleeping arrangement.  I decided on a sleeping bag of sorts; there was no way I was buying an actual sleeping bag for an 8-month-old, so my mom sewed together the sides of a piece of fleece to make a little bag.  My plan was for Chubbs to sleep in his sleeping bag in between Chris and me in our zipped-together sleeping bags.

On our first night, I put Chubbs down for the night in his sleeping bag, and a few hours later, we joined him in the tent.  On a side note, getting ready for bed in a semi-dark tent while simultaneously trying to get the dog to lay down, attempting not to fall over, and avoiding waking the baby is no small feat.  Anyway, after we were finally in our sleeping bags with the baby in between us in his little bag, we drifted off to sleep to the sound of the creek near our tent.

I awoke two hours later to a squirmy, sweaty, hot baby.  Apparently, Chubbs is a roasty-toasty little fellow who was not terribly pleased by my attempts to wrap him in several layers of fleece.  So I took him out of his fleece bag and he slept quite comfortably between Chris and me in our sleeping bags, occasionally kicking off the portion covering him.  I was the only one who was cold.  The next two nights we removed Chubbs from his bag before going to sleep.

Chubbs loved pretty much everything about camping: waking up to the dog's nose in his face, hanging out in the tent (to a point), being outside the majority of the time, watching the trees sway in the wind, playing with sticks four times his size, eating pancakes, and being held most of the time.  The only thing he did not like?  Not having his bouncer there.  But there was no way I was packing that monstrosity in the already crammed-full car.  Besides, this way everyone got a great arm workout.

Thinking of going camping with your kiddo?  Here are my tips:

1) Bring lots of clothes

2) Bring extra wipes - camping is dirty

3) Don't wrap your kid in enough layers to keep him warm in sub-zero conditions.  Unless, of course, you are camping in sub-zero conditions, in which case I say, You're crazy.

4) Go with friends to increase the adult-to-child ratio.  This ensures that there is always someone to hold the baby when you need to pee.

5) Just go!  It's really not as hard as you think it might be.